Biologically speaking
by nishanightray
Summary: In which Echizen will likely re-think all of his life choices, Kintarou's way too naive, and Shiraishi doesn't know what to do with his rookie's childishness. / KintarouxRyoma, hints of KenyaxHikaru.
**Hi~ It has been a while since I last posted something on this account, and today I'm gonna give you some more KinRyo + Shitenhouji's idiots, because by now you all know I'm weak for them XD I actually wrote this for a friend of mine, who asked me for some KinRyo. So, here we go!**

 **Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis' characters don't belong to me, but to their original creator, Takeshi Konomi. I only own my stories.**

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 _ **.: Biologically speaking :.**_

"Okay guys, let's start our training!" Shiraishi said, and all the members raised their arms to show their enthusiasm to his words, including Zaizen, whose expression was as blank as usual.

Shiraishi watched as his teammates walked to the courts, excitedly discussing how to pair up; as he mentally counted them to make sure they were all there, he noticed the absence of one of their most problematic members, none other than their rowdy rookie. Kintarou was strong, but he was highly undisciplined and Shiraishi couldn't help but worry about him.

"Zaizen, did you see Kin-chan?" Shiraishi asked his kouhai as he passed by his side. Zaizen shrugged, and Oshitari answered in his place.

"I haven't seen him all morning, now that I think about it. He must be tormenting Echizen somewhere," he said.

Shirashi sighed and nodded: it was only expected that Kintarou'd run to Echizen as soon as he knew the other rookie was in Osaka. There was nothing they could do about that, so Shiraishi decided it would be better to start training without the rookie, instead of waiting for him; he would find his way on his own when he wanted to.

About half an hour had already passed when they heard a loud scream, followed by the rumbling of footsteps, and then Kintarou showed up on the court. Shiraishi turned to scold him, but Kintarou surpassed him and launched himself onto Kenya, crushing him in a wild hug that nearly made him fall on his back. Kenya yelped, but somehow managed to keep himself steady on his feet and stared worriedly at the red-haired boy in his arms.

"Kin-chan? Are you okay? What happened?" he asked, softly patting his back.

Kintarou looked up, his eyes and voice full of desperation.

"Kenya, what should I do?! I think… I think I'm gonna have a baby!" he screamed.

For a moment only silence surrounded them, then everyone started making all kind of comments as it seemed that everyone wanted to state his own opinion on the matter, until Shiraishi shut them all up.

"Kin-chan," the captain said, slowly, "would you mind explaining the meaning of this?"

"Koshimae… Koshimae did! I didn't do anything, I swear, I just wanted to play!" Kintarou said, agitating his arms wildly and nearly punching Kenya's stomach. "But he didn't want to and said no, he said I was annoying, but I kept asking and then… then he did _that_!"

"He did _what_?" Zaizen interrupted him, apparently curious.

Kintarou bit his lower lip, then hid his embarrassed face behind his hands.

"Koshimae… he _kissed_ me! On the mouth! And now I will have babies!" He wailed and shook his head strongly. Everyone took a sigh out of relief, and Shiraishi lightly patted his kouhai's head.

"Oh, Kin-chan, don't be silly. A simple kiss isn't enough to get you pregnant," he gently explained.

"Nothing will get you pregnant, actually," Zaizen said, matter-of-factly. "Biologically speaking, you're a male. You can't make babies."

"Otherwise, Kenya and Hikaru would have a lot already," Chitose said, smiling peacefully as he didn't seem to notice Zaizen's glare and Kenya's spluttering at his comment, while Koharu and Yuuji laughed so much they nearly cried.

Meanwhile, Kintarou had seemingly relaxed, even though he wasn't entirely convinced.

"But if a kiss is not enough, what do you have to do? My mum said she and dad kissed a lot, and then I was born!" He said, crossing his arms behind his head.

"I don't think we're all quite ready for this conversation," Shiraishi coughed and looked towards Koishikawa for help. Koishikawa passed a hand through his hair nervously, but just as he was about to say something he was interrupted by Koharu.

"Oooh, Kin-chan, you're so audacious! To make a baby you need great passion, you need to be loved so much you feel shaken up inside! But you're too young now, so wait another two or three years, alright?" he said, and he made an unnecessary pirouette as Yuuji clapped enthusiastically at his words.

While the rest of the team was speechless, Kintarou put a hand on his chin as he pondered over Koharu's words.

"I get it now!" he said cheerfully. "Only people who _reaaaally_ love each other can make babies, right? So, are Kenya and Hikaru going to have babies soon?"

At this point Kenya's face was so red that he seemed on the verge of exploding. Chitose laughed and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Well, if you want a brother so much, Kintarou, Kenya's going to do his best, right?"

"Chitose, I'll hit you, I swear—" Kenya said in a strained voice, and he truly didn't want to look towards Hikaru to see his reaction. His boyfriend was probably already entertaining homicidal thoughts. Shiraishi coughed to regain the others' attention.

"However, Kin-chan," he said, "the fact that it's safe doesn't mean you should let Echizen kiss you if you don't like it, so you have to talk to him, alright?"

Kintarou stared at him, seemingly confused. "It's not that I didn't like it," he said, as though Shiraishi'd just suggested something ridiculous. "I'm just not ready to have babies, you know? But thanks for your help, I'm going to find Koshimae and talk to him right now, see you tomorrow!" And then Kintarou was gone, just as quickly as he'd arrived. Shiraishi looked at him running away, then turned to his teammates.

"Not a word about this, now," he said. "Let's resume training. And Kenya, you need to start breathing again."

xxx

Sitting on a bench, Echizen stared at the ground wishing it would swallow him and free him of his misery. He didn't know what had passed through his mind earlier, but Kintarou was being so annoying and he just wanted him to shut up, and… well. Kintarou had looked so shocked. Echizen had never seen such an expression on his face, and to say the truth it kinda hurt that Kintarou had run away without giving him any chance to talk. It had been Kintarou's first kiss, probably. (It was Echizen's first, too, but he wasn't going to dwell on that; it was hardly a real kiss, after all, as he just pressed his lips on Kintarou's.)

He was still lost in his own thoughts when he noticed the sun had gone away, or better said someone had stopped in front him and now shaded him from the light.

Echizen was surprised to see that it was none other than Kintarou. From the way he had reacted earlier, he'd thought that Kintarou wouldn't show up for a while, but here he was again. He'd always been very fast to bounce back, no matter how many times he was rejected or ignored.

Echizen thought he had to say something first. But just as he was about to apologize, Kintarou beat him to the punch.

"I'm sorry I run away," he said, sitting beside him and swinging his legs. "I thought you'd made me pregnant, but now I'm okay."

"I… _Wait,_ _what_?!" Echized stared at him, incredulous. Kintarou didn't seem fazed at all.

"Shiraishi assured me we can't get pregnant, even though I didn't really understand the rest. So, there's nothing to worry about!"

"That's… Well, that's _good_ , but did you really think…? I mean, was that the only reason why you…?" Echizen bit his lower lip. He couldn't believe he actually worried so much because of that idiot. "Oh, never mind, you know what? You can just forget it happened." He tried to get up and leave, but Kintarou pulled on his tennis bag and made him sit again.

"No no no, Koshimae, listen to me!" he said, excitedly. "We're safe, so we can do that anytime we want, isn't that right? We should definitely do that more!"

Echizen stared at him.

"You think we should… kiss more," he said, just to be sure. Kintarou nodded and grinned happily.

 _He's crazy,_ Echizen thought, _he's completely, utterly out of his mind._ But what would that say about him, since he was actually looking forward to do that with Kintarou? Echizen thought he might have gone crazy, too. Kintarou made no sense at all, yet Echizen wanted to follow him.

"Alright," he muttered, "if you really want too."

Kintarou's smile grew wider, brighter, and Echizen didn't even have time to pull his beret down to hide his embarrassment as his breathe was taken away by another kiss.

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 **n/A: I like to think that Kintarou's naive and childish about certain matters... but he can also be kind of bold! Echizen, Shiraishi and everyone else might have a heart attack because of him, lol (Kenya and Hikaru especially. Poor guys).**

 **Hope you liked this, and might leave me a comment :)**

 **bye~**

 **nisha**


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